Monday, September 6, 2010

The blessing of adoption

I have been crying lots of tears of joy this morning. My cousin and her husband just adopted this beautiful little girl last night from China. They are there right now. Every time I look at this picture, and the pictures of her with her new parents, I just bawl. Knowing all they went through, and how long they have waited, I am just so thrilled for them. They wrote about how surreal it all was, and how they felt shell-
shocked. It brought back memories of when Jeff and I first held Evie. Unlike with a pregnancy, adoption doesn't have 9 months of preparation. Most of the time people wait and wait, then everything happens super fast all at once. You almost never know when things will happen. It only took us a year to get Evie. It took my cousin and her husband almost 5 years to get this precious baby. The wait for adoptions seems to be much longer now than when we adopted. Domestic adoptions are becoming so scarce that most people are adopting internationally.

When we were waiting to adopt, we found out a month before Evie was born that we had been chosen by Evie's birthmom. After Evie was born, we had to wait to see if her birthmom would really go through with the adoption. When we got the call to go to the hospital because Evie was really ours, we really didn't have any emotional preparation. It was SO surreal. I still remember just staring at her. I thought I would be crying hard, but instead I just couldn't wrap my brain around the fact that I was holding my daughter. She was absolutely beautiful, and such an amazing gift. I am so thankful that her birthmother chose life for her. As I look back and see the journey we have been on, I cherish all the memories. She has been such a huge gift to us. There are verses in the Bible that talk about how God adopts us into His family when we accept Jesus Christ as our personal Savior. Having adopted, I see those verses in a different light. I view Evie as my flesh and blood, even though I didn't give birth to her. If I see her that way, in all my human-ness, how much more would God my Father who is perfect see us that way! My heart is so full this morning. I am so thankful for the blessing of adoption. I am so thankful for this new, beautiful baby girl in our family, who will grow up in such a wonderful home. What a blessing knowing that she will grow up hearing about the Lord. God is such a good God!


SchnauzerMom said...

She is so adorable! I didn't realize that adoptions are getting difficult. Is it because more women are choosing to keep their babies?

Jen said...

Yes, that really seems to be the case. One of my cousins works in labor and delivery in a large hospital, and has for many years. She told me that she used to see women every few months choose to give their babies up for adoption. She told me that she can't remember the last time that happened. Now these teenage girls come in having their 4th child, and you can hear them talking to their friends (who also have multiple children), asking who their "baby daddies" are. They have no interest in the babies, it is just a status symbol. Very, very sad. Those children are the ones who end up suffering. I really believe this is why so many are choosing international adoption. When we were waiting to adopt Evie, there were 10 other families on our agency's waiting list for our state for domestic adoption. Now there are only 2 families listed that are waiting. Over the past few years, I have checked the agency's website, and there has never been more than 2 families. So I believe there has been a huge shift towards international adoption.

April said...

What a beautiful little girl. I'm so glad she will be a part of your family where she will get sooo much love. :)

The teenage story is so sad for the children involved. I can't imagine having a child (or children!) as a status thing. What is the world coming to?

I just love the picture of you, Jeff and Evie. What a tiny, little thing she was. :)

Jules said...

What a wonderful day for your family and what a precious gift this child's birth mother has given you all. We had friends that adopted and their family went from 4 to 7 overnight when they adopted 3 sibings and with no warning so I understand a little of what you're saying about it being so surreal.

Your comment about teens and single mothers keeping their babies is true but I suspect that there's another - heartbreaking - reason why there are fewer adoptions and that's because women are choosing not to give their babies life. I know adoption lists in some countries have been closed for years because there are just no children available to families wanting to adopt. So sad when there are so many people wanting to offer love to a little one.

I agree with April: love that photo of the three of you together.

Jen said...

April - I know, it seems so unreal that girls would have babies for such a reason as that. It is hard for me not to get really upset when I see a teenage mom with 3 kids, and she is screaming obscenities at them :(. I'm so thankful for Evie's birthmom, and what she did for Evie (and us!). Thank you for the compliment :). She was only 7 pounds 1 ounce, so she was pretty tiny :)...and beautiful!

Jules - wow, that would be a shock to change family size that much in one day! Very awesome too :). You made such a good point about the other reason why there are so few babies. Jeff and I talk about that a lot. So very, very sad. Abortion is considered the "easy" solution, and yet women are not told how traumatic it is, and the immense guilt they will feel afterwards. If only they would consider adoption. It seems like adoption is almost never even talked about with teenagers who are pregnant. They think there are two options: abort or keep the baby. It makes me so sad because there are so many families who are struggling with infertility.
Thank you for the compliment about the picture, by the way :). We look so YOUNG :)!