Monday, July 6, 2009
The past coming back to bite me
I was browsing the internet yesterday, and about fell out of my chair. I was on YouTube, just surfing, and looking at some long hair videos. Jeff was sitting in the room with me, and I came across a video and about freaked. I said to Jeff, "OH....MY.....WORD!! That's ME!!" I just sat there in complete shock staring at a video of me brushing my hair. About 9 years ago, way before Facebook and YouTube, and long before I knew about creepy things like long hair fetishes, I was a long hair model. I did a few photo shoots, and a few videos with me brushing my hair. I didn't really think about who would see these pictures or videos, and at that time, YouTube didn't even exist. I was young and naive. If I had known about YouTube back then, and about the fact that millions of people could view a video of me, I would never have done it. I signed something that gave permission for the person who took the videos and pictures to sell them, so there is nothing I can do about my video being put on YouTube. Thankfully you can barely see my face. The worst part though is the comments! Yikes!!! My hair at that time was not super healthy. I hadn't found The Long Hair Loom at that point, so I wasn't taking very good care of my hair. It had lots of splits, and was pretty raggedy at the ends. Still, even knowing that, the comments really burned. I read things like, "Eww, that is just gross" and "Cut that nasty hair" and "She needs a pony tail holder with a blade attached to the end of it" and "It looks like a dog is caught in her hair". Then there were the ultra creepy comments that were made, that just made me want to throw up. So it was a really great day for the self esteem (not!), and a day where I really wanted to kick myself for ever doing the long hair modeling thing.